How To Manage Dating, Finances, School and Bodybuilding When You’re Young

This post is catered more to young adults fresh out of high school with the world at their fingertips; eager to experience everything they can all at once.

When I was 18….

After graduating high school I had maybe a couple hundred bucks in my bank account, had no substantial dating experience, had just started getting into lifting seriously and had been doing so for about a year, and had just got accepted into a prestigious university program that would inevitably consume a substantial amount of the next 4+ years of my life.

What were my priorities? Well I wanted to make money, date hordes of gorgeous women, get a killer physique, and do well in school to set myself up for my future.

Easier said than done.

On paper, 4 goals doesn’t sound like a lot, but in reality, all of these things take up literally a humongous portion of your life, and completing them all at once is impossible.

One Thing I Have Learned After Managing My Priorities Over The Past 4 years

It is FAR more beneficial to dedicate almost all of your time to 1 specific big goal than it is to try completing several huge life goals at once.

If I truly went all out trying to do all 4 of these things at once over the past 5 years, I undoubtedly would have got unsatisfactory results in most (if not all) 4 of these goals.

How My Post-Secondary Experience Went

In my first couple semesters, I worked maybe 16 hours per week max at a golf course and even that was pushing it for what my schedule could accommodate. I had four courses each semester and I worked out 5 times per week.

Basically, I had my full efforts aimed at maximizing my physique, and I was putting a half assed effort into school, as well as finance as I worked a shitty minimum wage part time gig, and my dating life had nothing going on.

I Made A Pivotal Decision In My Life

I still remember when a friend of mine showed me a video in 2012 on YouTube of a guy named Chris from goodlookingloser.com doing cold approaches. I was dumbfounded that a guy could just walk up to any girl he wanted and hit on them (I have no idea why now looking back) without knowing them first or having been introduced to by a friend.

I decided then and there to get my dating/sex life in check as I was entirely dissatisfied with it, and I don’t know why that video was such a kick in the ass for me, but I joined the goodlookingloser.com forums and the ball started rolling for me….. A LOT.

Basically, I had my full efforts aimed at maximizing my physique, and I was putting a half assed effort into school, as well as finance as I worked a shitty minimum wage part time gig, and my dating life had nothing going on.

After that point, I focused almost the entirety of my efforts on my physique and exploding my sex life.

I no longer had time to even work my 2-3 shifts per week, and I had dropped down to 1-2 short 4 hour shifts per week at my new lifeguarding job, and I was putting even less time into school than I was previously.

I was much more content with skating by with a B- average though and doing what I want in life than I would have been getting straight A’s and having no time to do anything else in my life that was of WAY more importance to me at that time.

In the next couple years

My life was essentially hitting on women, dating, sex and working out, while taking a lighter course load at school on purpose and working a minimal amount of hours as a lifeguard, and eventually as a bouncer as well.

I easily hit on at least 10-20 girls per week and almost never had less than 2-3 dates with new women every week or two once I got in a groove (not counting fuck buddies I continued to see and would also dedicate a night too once per week).

Now, this may sound like a colossal waste of time and effort to some, but the fact of the matter is, to ACTUALLY be a guy who sleeps with a multitude of new hot women on a very regular basis, you MUST hit on lots of women, and this takes up a substantial amount of time. Not to mention the time investment of actually going on dates with these women and hanging out with them.

The Truth About Players Who Get Laid A LOT

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Guys who boast lay counts of 100+ and aren’t lying (which 90% of them are) have invested such a large portion of their time into their sex lives; it becomes impossible to flourish in the other major aspects of your life, like finances.

Spending hours upon hours each day, each week going out everyday hitting on new woman, messaging girls on Tinder, Plenty Of Fish, etc. getting new girls on the phone and setting up dates, going on dates, this is all extremely time consuming stuff.

I truly believe that when guys look up to true “Players” as some sort of God Like men with superpowers, they aren’t realizing just how much of their lives are actually dedicated to being a successful player.

There is a huge common misconception that these God’s gift to the planet kind of players that many people look up to simply have women fall into their lap, but the reality is, they PUT IN FUCKING WORK to get that good and get that many women in bed.

Most days I actually had a difficult time getting to my classes because I would have a date coming up or I’d be out hitting on new women.

How This Applies To Finances And Making Money

The same thing applies for a guy that is busting his ass to make tons of money.

If a guy is grinding hard day in and day out, working 40-60 hours per week just cranking out brutal intense hours to get rich, do you really think this guy who seemingly “has it made” has much time leftover to go sleep with a bunch of women or really have a social life for that matter? Definitely not.

Hopefully he is content with that though and already has his sex life handled or else he will definitely have some major regrets and “what ifs” in his head.

The Number One Thing I Recommend To Any Young Guy

The number one thing I recommend to any young guy who isn’t yet content with their sex life, finances, education, etc. is to focus on ONE and just one for a set period of time.

If you dedicated one year to strictly going all out trying to blow up your sex life, I GUARANTEE it would be 10x more productive than trying to get rich, get straight A’s, and tag a bunch of new girls all in a 3 year span. That 1 year of dedicated focus can do absolute wonders for you.

The main issue is, many people try to do everything at once each year, and then before they know it they are in their 30’s and feeling like they severely underachieved in all facets of their life.

How To Manage Your 20's

After high school, figure out what you care most about, and dedicate the next 2-3 years SOLELY to that one goal.

For me, I wanted to get my sex life handled and improve my physique.


These go hand in hand as my bodybuilding helped improve my appearance, which improved my results in my dating life.

I put finances on the back-burner to such a degree that I was literally living pay cheque to pay cheque, but damn am I ever glad I did that for those years.

There is a lingering sense of failure and “what could have been” thoughts eating away at you if you don’t fully exhaust your goals and fully achieve them.

For me, I definitely felt like if I settled down with one girl and focused on other things, I knew I would have regretted it and have felt like I was missing out not still being in the dating game.

After almost 3 years of partying, dating, wild sex, and crushing my approach anxiety, I had finally reached a state where I felt satisfied with what I had done, and no longer felt like I would be missing out on life if I moved onto a new goal in my life.

My focus entirely shifted towards money after this point, and although I no longer have time to date like I used to, I am totally content and ok with that.

After dating that much and that many women, you have such a depth of experience, a sense of entitlement, and have built up the confidence you absolutely will never be needy to women again as you will KNOW FOR A FACT that if at any time your sex life took a negative turn, you could shift your focus back and spend a week or two dedicated fully to getting your dating life back in check and easily meet a few new gorgeous women who will be more than grateful to have you in their dating/sex life.

DO NOT Leave Unfinished Business

I have achieved what I wanted to, and I don’t have any unfinished business left plaguing my mind in regards to my dating/sex life.

Also, now that I’m not going on dates every day or two, I have a substantial amount of free time I can dedicate solely to my new goal.

Ask yourself truly, what do you truly want more than anything in your life right at this moment. Once you have defined that, GET AFTER IT!


Obviously if something is impairing your number one goal to a huge degree, then that should become your prioritized goal to get done ASAP so you can move onto crushing your real goals. A good example of this is if you live in a town in the middle of nowhere with a small population, but you care about getting your sex life in check, you may want to consider making finances your number one priority for a defined period of time so you can enable yourself to move to a bigger city, allowing you to pursue your REAL number one goal.

Don’t let your youth slip away by wasting your time fucking around or half assing a bunch of different goals.

Pick a goal, and bust your ass literally killing that one goal and completely and entirely exhausting it until it is bone dry and you have no further desire to pursue it.


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About Derek

After dedicating over 8 years to extreme self-improvement, I have created "More Plates More Dates" as a one stop shop for helping you to get yourself on the right path to the "best you" possible too.


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