This is also applicable if you moved to a new area and literally don’t know anybody, which can feel very overwhelming.
A quick disclaimer before we being, it should also go without saying that online dating is a no-brainer to supplement your cold approaching with, but this article is going to address cold approaching specifically.
Most men wouldn’t even know where to start in terms of building a social circle or how to meet women, especially if they’re used to getting them handed to them on a silver platter in the past through their social circles and parties.
Let’s just say you’re in either situation, where you don’t really know anybody, you’re in a new area, you’re introverted, and you don’t have any friends to begin with.
In my experience, these are the top three places to meet women.
1. University And College Campuses
Obviously, this is going to depend largely on if you have a reason to be there or not.
Some people are comfortable going on campus even if they aren’t a student, which is good because there is no reason why you shouldn’t be.
You should be comfortable going wherever you want by yourself.
A university or college campus is a great place to meet people, especially if you’re young.
If you’re in your early 20’s, or your late teens, you already know that all the girls are in your age range on campus without having to second guess it.
You also know that the likelihood of them being there without a clique around them is very high, as opposed to high school where girls are lumped up into friend groups at all times.
In universities and colleges, the campuses are littered with attractive women at every turn, and they are very often in very favorable settings that won’t require you to win over a group of 5 chicks just to hit on the 1 girl you’re going for.
I have yet to find another location that has even a fraction of the abundance of attractive women per square meter that are just chilling on their own.
Sitting between classes studying, walking to the bus loop, walking to class, walking to the gym, sitting on their phones waiting for their next class to start, the scenarios are endless in which you will find girls in minimally intimidating/very approachable settings, which is great for guys who are just starting out.
On campus you can literally get a weeks worth of dates set up within 1 hour of approaching.
There is nothing more efficient.
Most guys think it’s the parties where you get the girls in college, but I think it is on campus during the day time where you can efficiently crank out highest volume work.
If you’re a social guy who’s able to approach women at will without having severe crippling social anxiety, that’s the first place to meet women in my opinion.
2. A Bar Close To Your Place
Typically, it’s a lot more cost effective to live near a popular bar than it is to live near a popular club, at least where I live.
I advise finding the closest bar to your place with a thriving night scene and making that your go to spot (don’t pick a sh*t hole dive bar just because it’s close to your place though).
There is usually at least a couple good bars in each city.
If you happen to live within walking distance, then that’s even better.
The shorter the commute from the bar to your place the better for avoiding last minute resistance and other unforeseen complications.
It can not only be your night-life spot on, but your date spot during the day as well.
A bar close to your place is by far the easiest place to set up a consistent blueprint for going on first dates with girls you’ve cold approached during the day/met via online dating (during the bars dead hours), as well as meeting new people in the night scene during the bars busy nights.
At the bar you can actually get a good conversation going, whereas at a club you’re basically yelling in each other’s ears pretending you know what each other are saying when you don’t.
My strategy each week was more or less to crank out cold approaches on campus and wherever my daily errands took me and set up dates with those girls the same day I met them, as well as do a blitz on Sunday nights on all the online dating platforms and set up as many dates for the coming week as possible (the best time to blitz is Sunday night still in my opinion).
If by Friday and Saturday I didn’t have dates set up that night or I didn’t have a follow up with a girl I was already seeing, I would go to the bar.
Become Comfortable Going To Bars Even By Yourself
If you have no friends, that’s fine.
Unless you’re literally standing on a wall by yourself and looking awkward, no one’s going to know or care if you’re there by yourself because you’re going to be walking around and socializing.
You can easily make friends at bars and build a social circle throughout the night as you communicate with women and talk to other men.
When guys see you having success with women, by nature they want to become your friend and hang out with you.
Women by nature will also be more attracted to you and willing to talk to you if you have social proof via other attractive women.
It’s extremely easy to build this kind of social proof too, even if you don’t know anybody.
When you see a guy talking to a girl, unless he looks like a complete creep or there’s something totally off about his demeanour or the girl he’s talking to, most will assume that he’s with her without even questioning it.
Use this to your advantage in the night scene.
You can either look like the creepiest dude in the room by hitting on every girl, or you can spin it and make it look like you’re the most popular guy in the room just as easily.
Recruit A Wing Woman
Something I came up with on the fly when I first started heavily getting into night game was recruiting a wing woman.
This idea dawned on me one night at a bar 7 years ago while I was hitting on a chick who seemed mildly interested in me, but repeatedly told me she had a boyfriend and would playfully stop me each time I tried to make a move (something I don’t advise you try to capitalize on necessarily, but I could’ve cared less at the time).
Even if this girl flat out rejected me I still would’ve done the same thing I’m about to explain by the way, as long as the girl doesn’t obviously think you’re a creepy piece of sh*t this should work (which should almost never happen if you look good and have even have decent conversation skills).
If you can tell you aren’t getting anywhere, or you get lightly rejected, tell the girl that she’s going to be your wing woman for the night.
More often than not, they’ll jump at the idea and act like your best friend for the night and literally get girls for you.
Every single person for the most part has some level of social anxiety, which is the reason why most men and women are just standing and talking to their friends being wallflowers at the bar.
Very often, they’ll gladly act like your best friend for the night and literally hand girls to you on a silver platter just because they think it’s fun, and it’s something for them to do rather than sit around and chug beer at a table with their friends.
If you’re laughing with an attractive woman, naturally, every one in the room will start to perceive you as someone with higher value.
As she introduces you to other attractive girls (who she probably doesn’t even know either) and plays wing-woman for you throughout the night, you can artificially inflate your social proof to stupid high levels and make every one think you’re some big shot, even if you literally showed up an hour ago with no friends.
Think about it logically, if you saw a guy laughing and visibly having a great time with an attractive chick, and then 10 minutes later you see him laughing and having a great time with another attractive chick, and he’s just all over the map and seemingly knows every one, you won’t know any better, and neither will anyone else.
The girls you meet will logically assume that you’re close friends with the girl wing-manning you, or else she wouldn’t have been “at the bar with you” in the first place.
The idea is gold and if executed correctly can literally transform the dynamic of any night game setting for you.
If you get a girl into a mindset of trying this fun, unique thing that she’s probably never done before, I guarantee you she will more often than not be up for it.
If you’re a chill guy with above average looks (not hard to do), and a girl rejects you, she’s not going to think you’re a creep unless you come across as a creep.
3. Wherever You Go During The Day
This is probably the best tip, because what a lot of guys make a mistake doing is they go out in dedicated blocks of their free time to cold approach.
The way you should be doing cold approach in a time efficient way is incorporating it into your every day schedule.
If you’re going to the grocery store, going to the mall, running errands, going to the post office, etc., the likelihood of you crossing paths with attractive women is pretty high.
You’re going to have to leave your house at some point to go run errands.
When you run errands, you’re going to come across attractive women.
This is where you will knock out your cold approaches.
It’s very unlikely that you’re going to go find more sexually available women if you set aside a block of an hour to go cold approach at a mall as opposed to just incorporating cold approach into the errands you do already.
I’m sure you’ve gone to grocery stores to shop and been pissed at yourself because you didn’t approach that cute girl you saw, or you’re at the gym and you didn’t strike up a conversation with that chick you see however often, or you were at the mall shopping and bit*hed out from hitting on the really attractive girl you noticed working there and you went home kicking yourself.
I guarantee you’ve had a situation like this before that’s pissed you off that you know that you should have capitalized on.
This is why you NEED to incorporate cold approach into your daily life.
If you’re a student on campus this is especially applicable to you, as you literally are walking around in the quintessential hub of vagina on a daily basis and don’t do sh*t about it.
Stop thinking about how you will get hammered out of your mind at that party coming up next weekend and then somehow get laid and take advantage of what is literally abundantly present right in front of your eyes man.
On any campus just during the time span of walking from one class to another class you could very likely knock out 3 quality approaches.
Social Anxiety And Approach Anxiety
You need to have your social anxiety and approach anxiety handled.
Especially if you aren’t going to be in densely filled areas like college campuses.
If you’re walking around in the daytime running errands and you see somebody random, you need to capitalize.
You can’t overthink it for 5 minutes and then eat your heart out after you see her walk out the door.
Eventually, once you get very good at this (you can approach 9 out of 10 women at the drop of a hat), you can incorporate it into your daily life and will never have to set aside time to go approaching again, and it’ll just be a part of your everyday routine.
Incorporate Cold Approach With Your Daily Life
All of the three mentioned places are very effective to meet women, and I strongly advise you to incorporate them into your daily life.
That’s the key, incorporating them into your daily life rather than setting aside blocks of time.
If you need to go knock out approach anxiety and blow it out, then go out with buddies and set aside time to do that.
But once you get that handled, you shouldn’t have to go set aside massive blocks of time anymore as it should be seamlessly incorporated into your every day routine on the fly.
Once you can actually approach women, this should become integrated into your life, rather than something that seems like a chore that you have to go out of your way to do.
Why Clubs Are Overrated
Clubs are extremely overrated.
One reason is that the likelihood of a club being within walking distance of your place is typically very low.
Another reason being that the absurdly high volume music is a huge inhibiting factor to having a fluid conversation.
In general, when girls go out to clubs they’re traveling from further away and are in bigger groups, hence they are less likely to break off from the group.
Unless you have a spot literally in the heart of downtown, or if the clubs are in your area where you can easily invite people back for a drink and break them off from the group, you won’t have much success at clubs other than random makeouts and number collecting, which is a waste of time.
Clubs are subpar in terms of efficiency.
Even making friends in general at clubs is hard because you can’t use your social skills as much.
It comes down to physical game more so than verbal at the club.
Even if you’ve developed your social freedom over the years and have great conversation skills, it is difficult to take advantage of it when you literally have to scream in the ear of the person you’re talking to.